Rugby has been a corner stone of my life.

My closest friends, my jobs, my travels around the world… some of my fondest memories come from rugby.

Sports and rugby specifically, has been a glue that has held my life together.  It’s taught me how to win and to lose, the essence of “team”, and the value of hard work and perseverance.

I found the game at the University of North Carolina at Wilmington in 1998. The Clamdiggers were a rowdy bunch of beach boys that played hard and enjoyed all the fruits of a slow, Southern beach town. We were pretty good, loved each other, and simply had a blast.

I became a student of the game and soon was selected to play All South as a Junior and then to represent the United States at the 16th World Maccabi games, in Israel as a senior.

The World Maccabi Games are a multisport tournament comprised of athletes from Jewish heritage held in Israel every 4 years. It is reported as the third largest sporting event in the world and many world record holders and Olympic medalists have competed. As one of the youngest and most inexperienced members on the team, I did not see very much playing time in our Silver Medal effort, but the experience was incredible.

UNCW was also a major feeder program to Cape Fear RFC (rugby football club), the local men’s club. That club was, and is fantastic. They put on a wonderful tournament each summer, have their own pitch (field), and have a solid core of members to perpetuate its existence. The men that make up that club remain some of my very best friends.

A few years after college I was recruited by the head coach of Santa Monica RFC to train with Santa Monica in a run for a National Title.  I also set to play again for the United States in the 17th Maccabi World Games. With Santa Monica, we met our goal of winning Division 1 National Championship. The coaching and support staff were world class and the players were the best I’d ever been privileged to take the field with. Every game we got better and we smashed the opposition.

To win on that stage meant cooperation, focus, communication, and hunger to ones core at a level that I had never known.  It meant training and playing with team mates with grace and positive interaction.  Making sacrifice was the expected status quo.  Integrity, on and off the field, was baked in.

Immediately following, I joined my USA Maccabi team to travel to Israel. This time I would see plenty of playing time and again, we would lose in the final to South Africa. I was really sick. Perhaps it was because I had just enjoyed so much success on the pitch with Santa Monica. In any event, I was bitter and sad and frustrated.

Returning to Santa Monica RFC in 2006, we would march on to back-to-back National Titles. Experience played a role, as many of the core players returned from the previous year.  The feeling was amazing!

I then got selected to play for one of two United States teams in the first North American 4 tournament in Western Canada. You had to pinch me!  It was all just so much fun!!

As 2007 came and went, I found my body beginning to ache. My back was constantly sore and I couldn’t really do anything without pain. I was born with my lumbar spine a bit wonky and playing competitive rugby probably didn’t help. I finally decided to have surgery on November 7th 2007.

Rugby as I knew it, was done.

My life went from rugby being the center of my universe to this thing I would mention in line at the store when I saw fellow walk by with a jersey on.

I think I spoke to one coach once regarding the 2009 games and simply said “No.  I wasn’t interested”.

My heart was broken.

I’d achieved nearly everything I ever dreamed of as a player: I’d forged friendships that I know will outlive me.  I’d been privileged to have amazing coaches that wanted me to learn. I’d won National Titles.  I’d represented my country.  I traveled around the world with an egg in my hand.

But I never did win that last game in Israel.

Over the coming years I remained close to the game.

I visited Argentina and played a bit of social footy with the boys. I organized a tour with some friends from college to see the World Cup in New Zealand and mixed a few friendly matches in. I enjoyed touch rugby with the BeachBoks on Sundays and social matches at my annual university alumni game.

In late 2011 I was asked to help recruit players for the United States Maccabi team, to compete in 2013.

I agreed.

Then the mental pain started. Like, real bad.

I was privy to each and every email that came in from young guys that wanted to try out. They listed their experience, stats, and current club. From across the country, guys wrote in that they thought they had what it took to be a part of this team.

I was walking around in circles mad, like a bulldog chewing on a hornet!

I wanted to play!

Long conversations with my mom followed long conversations with myself.

Did I still have the desire? Did I still have the health to compete at this level? Did I have the drive to train for the next year to prepare my mind and body for what is undoubtedly the hardest mental and physical test I know of: 4 or 5 full on games in 13 days..in Israel..in the dead of summer..following an unquestionably long season of top grade rugby with Santa Monica RFC.

There is no dress rehearsal in life. You get no second chances.

All in. This will be my swan song. Let’s make it a good one.

I contacted the staff from Santa Monica Rugby Club to let them know that I was keen to play for them as preparation.

I want another National Championship.

I notified the coaching staff that I would be removing myself as recruiter, but wanted to throw my hat in the ring to try out as a player.

I want a Gold medal.

I started to hit the gym. Eating right. Getting more rest.

I started making hard decisions.

As a side note, with the new goal in mind, I found my tolerance for BS to go through the floor. No more time for folks that were slugs. No patience for complainers. Folks that had nothing positive going on, got nothing from me.

My body started to improve. BeachBok weekends with the cheetahs helped my hands get softer and wind enter my lungs. Heavy practice with Santa Monica RFC hardened me to be able to hit and get hit.  I met new players on the team and started to gel with them on and off the pitch.  I learned the nuance of a different brand of rugby from a new generation of coaches.

I suppose the results speak for themselves.

At the time of this writing Santa Monica RFC is 5-1, losing by only 4 points in a slug fest with the defending National Champions.  We are just now beginning to hit our stride.

I have also been appointed to represent the United States in the Maccabi World Games in July.  This team has been lauded as the best ever assembled to compete in this tournament.

The coaches and my peers went on to elect me Vice Captain of the team.

I am humbled and I am honored.

Long hours and a hard road lay ahead.  Training takes place daily.  Food, rest, and study are scheduled.  Sacrifices, large and small, are being made such that we can play at the highest level.

The family that is this team in incredible.  The tournament is the epitome of all that is good about sports.

To me, the Maccabi World Games are about heritage, awareness, peace, and athletic competition. So much about a positive life experience is learned with the ball in hand on a grass field joined by friends.

In addition to the training I must do to prepare myself physically and mentally, I am also required to raise a bit of money for the organization.

The funds help subsidize flights, hotels, food, training facilities, medical treatment, and uniforms… they also go to help other athletes that may not be able to afford the cost to attend in the form of scholarships.

If you have the means, I would appreciate your help in raising my share.

Donate now

Contributions can take 2 forms.

• Non-tax deductible : You’ll get awesome raffle tickets in exchange for your contributions in excess of $100. Raffle prizes include tickets to the Super Bowl, the Masters, $5,000 in cash and more.  You’ll need to contact me directly to get these tickets.
• Tax deductible : Out right donation. You’ll get no raffle tickets, but I have a few personal items to offer.

To sweeten the pot for folks interested in supporting my effort to represent the United States in the 2013 World Maccabi Games I am offering the following:

$20 or more – Free Tablet Volume
$100 or more – The above, plus I will volunteer for the charity of your choosing for an afternoon.
$300 or more – The above, plus an exhaustive analysis of your business’s online efforts via all the resources I have at my disposal through my company, BusinessFrame.
$500 or more – The above, plus an evening dinner for 6 people aboard A Moveable Feast, a kinetic sculpture I helped Dan Busby build with friends.
$1,000 or more – The above, plus I’ll streak down the Venice Boardwalk (this is a rugby team, after all)

Really and truly, even $1 helps. You can contribute here.

During and after my travels I will be documenting the learning experience and rugby excitement right here on my blog and hope you’ll follow along.

I sincerely appreciate you helping me, my team, and the rest of the athletes that will be competing in this tournament. Competitive sports, specifically rugby, make life better.

In my final effort, your support means the absolute world to me.

Stay close,

AD

Monice Dworski Arnold died at her home in Durham, NC on January 4, 2012, attended by her children as she wished. She was 94; every day of her life was met with optimism and humor.

Born in Rochester, NY in 1917, she was the youngest of six children of Gertrude B. and Maurice Dworski, immigrants from Eastern Europe.

She attended Rochester city schools and graduated from the University of Illinois at Champaign-Urbana in 1941, studying Shakespeare and art history. She was the first girl in her family to attend college, and she made lifelong friends as a member of Alpha Epsilon Phi sorority.

During World War II, she managed and expanded her elder brothers’ businesses and property while they were serving in the military, the first of many unusual endeavors demonstrating her strong work ethic, commitment to family, and keen business acumen.

Monice married Ralph Arnold, MD in 1947 and moved with him to Durham, NC, where they embraced the vibrant academic and medical community at Duke University and had four children prior to Ralph’s passing in 1960.

She fully participated in the civic, cultural, and Jewish life of her adopted hometown of Durham. Monice was deeply devoted to her many volunteer activities, some of which included Beth El Synagogue, Hadassah, the Nasher Art Museum at Duke University, Carolina Theater, and Concern of Durham, Inc.

Fiercely independent, generous, and active until the end of her life, she nurtured friendships across generations and backgrounds and inspired all she met with her irrepressible joie de vivre.

A lifelong learner, Duke basketball fanatic, one time golf champion, social research interviewer, and unique matriarch, Monice was a true original.

She is lovingly remembered by her surviving family: daughter, Louise Davis and son-in-law, Cliff; sons, Andy Arnold, John Van Arnold and daughter-in-law, Donna, James Arnold; grandchildren Elizabeth Racheva and Danail Rachev, Aaron Davis, Benzie van Arnold, and Rachel van Arnold; and great-granddaughter, Kalina Racheva; as well as many nieces, nephews, cousins, and friends.

In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions in Monice’s name may be made to any of the following organizations: Beth El Legacy Fund, Beth El Synagogue, 1004 Watts Street, Durham, NC 27701; Nasher Museum of Art at Duke University, 2001 Campus Drive, Durham, NC 27705; The Carolina Theater, 309 West Morgan Street Durham, NC 27701; and Greenhouse for Girls and Greenhouse for Boys (Concern of Durham, Inc.), 3001 Academy Road, Suite 230, Durham, NC 27707.

“You’ve got to get your first tackle in early, even if it’s late.” – Ray Graved

I was a senior at the University of North Carolina at Wilmington and had been playing my heart out on the rugby pitch for 4 years. Two buddies and I had dreams of grandeur, to move to the rugby mother land, New Zealand, to live, love, play for a season or more.

Then we decided not to.

There wasn’t any specific reason not to go, as I recall. The plans just sort of fizzled. The dream did not.

I’m still friends with those two guys, great friends, although our lives are now separated by 1000’s of miles and completely different paths.

A few weeks ago, I called one of them from a beach in that far away land, and the first thing he said to me was, “You finally made it..”

Rugby has been a corner stone of my life since discovering it my first year at UNCW nearly 15 years ago..

I recall having a conversation about football with a fellow that I knew from a neighboring high school my very first day at Wilmington. When our chit-chat subsided, a french fellow beside me asked, “Why don’t you play rugby?”, in sort of a stuffy, heavy, sweaty french kind of way.

That french guy and I would also become great friends, like so many more guys that I would meet on the pitch. Renan Guillou and I would live together all through college and we still keep in touch, even though I’m in Los Angeles and he’s in Panama.

I digress.

Rugby has been a determining factor in where I’ve lived, traveled, and worked. It’s provided an incredible network, personal and professional. It’s opened the door to a relationship with more than one maiden and it’s closed it with a handful more.

I never understood it when I heard old guys say it when I started, “Once a rugger. Always a rugger. You’ll never really be done. Well, not until you’re dead..but even then..”

I fully understand it now.

These days, I feel more often than not, that my body is ready to call it a day. My schedule no longer allows for all of the training that is required to play at the level my heart desires. I’ve become interested in other sports and activities.

Yet, rugby remains.

I get energized when I smell the grass. I get excited to talk about footy with anyone. I get pissed off when I see another bloak play like a jerk on the pitch, especially when they play my position, by running like a sissy or missing a tackle or dropping a pass.  I suppose it stems from jealously that I’m not out there, but who knows.

I simply love the game.  Everything about it.

Rugby is and will always be in my blood.

The pinnacle of rugby competition is of course the World Cup.  The most holy of rugby lands is of course New Zealand.

__________

My neighbor, dear friend, fellow rugger , and owner of the Rugby Travel Company and I went sailing a couple years ago. We were 2 or 8 beers into an epic night when he said that we should put together a tour to New Zealand for the Rugby World Cup.

Sure! It’ll be legendary! Hell Yes!!

The following morning we confirmed our drunken plan and the stage was set.

I would find the guys to make the trek and he would plan all the travel. We would connect with teams in both New Zealand and Australia to play with and join at the pub. Excursions would be booked.

Fast forward to September 2011

In the end 10 men would meet in Los Angeles, coming from all over the United States, to embark on the trip of a life time. All but two, whom we elected an honorary alum, graduated from the University of North Carolina at Wilmington, our graduation dates spanning 14 years. We all work in different fields, from construction to law to software to nuclear reactor auditing..one guy might even by a secret agent man, but he’d have to kill us if he told us.

Marc Ingham
Chris Jaddick
Clayton Wilson
Eric Glasgow
Ron Dean
Ben Andrews
Aaron Davis
Taylor Monavian
Shane Castean
Jason Gruner

Our trip went went on like this..

Saturday 10th – Most of the crew arrive in Los Angeles. I, Aaron, put a few guys up and a few stayed on Simon’s sail boat in Marina del Rey.
Sunday 11th – Play touch rugby with the Beack Boks (primarily a South African group) and members of Santa Monica RFC on the beach in Santa Monica
Monday 12th – Depart Los Angeles
Tuesday 13th – Arrive in Auckland, NZ
Wednesday 14th – Pick up camper vans –> Travel to Rotarua and sulfur lake
Thursday 15th – Attend Russia vs. USA @ Stadium Taranaki, New Plymouth
Friday 16th – Travel to Helensville/Auckland. Stopped to tour Waitomo Glowworm Caves. Stopped to watch New Zealand v Japan at Stadium Waikato in Hamilton. Meet with Helensville RFC (Camp on Helensville Rugby Club Grounds ~ approximately 30 mins from Auckland)
Saturday 17th – Social game with Helensville RFC @1pm. The Helensville Youth Cutural Organization performed a traditional Maori dance and concert (amazing!). Our host family put a lamb on the spit and we watched rugby for the afternoon – Argentina v Romania @ 3pm, South Africa v Fiji @ 5pm, Australia v Ireland @ 8pm.
Sunday 18th – Clayton and Jaddick went deer hunting and the rest of the crew went Contiki fishing on the north eastern shore. Went to a thermal spring that had been turned in a water park..waterslide and all :)
Monday 19th – Return camper vans. Stay in hotel.
Tuesday 20th – Depart Auckland –> Fly to Sydney, Australia (Stay in Hotel)
Wednesday 21st – Big E, Clayton, Taylor and I visited the Blue Mountains (amazing). Others in the crew visited the Sydney Zoo, Opera House, Manly Beach, Bondi Beach…
Thursday 22nd – Tour Sydney
Friday 23rd – Played social game v Petersham Rugby club, Australia’s 2nd oldest club at Sydney University. Watch USA vs. Australia live on big screen.
Saturday 24th – Tour Sydney
Sunday 25th – Depart Sydney –> Fly to Los Angeles, CA

Was I tired of spooning dudes in camper vans? Yes.  Did I nearly kill myself and others driving on the wrong side of the road? Yes.  Did I go bat-shit crazy on the 14 hours flight half way around the world?  Absolutely.

Would I do it all over again?  Damn right!

It was unbelievable!

I’ll spare you..and those involved, to preserve innocence, the intimate details of the journey, as I am a firm believer that those moments belong only to those that experienced them.

However..

New Zealand is a land lost by time. It felt as though a brontosaurus was going to pop out at any moment. If you’ve ever been to the grand canyon, you know the feeling of awe by the shear scope of it all. Think about that and then cover everything with grass. Every thing was so green! Farms and fields everywhere. 15 minutes outside the city and it was as beautiful and peaceful a place as you have ever been. Ever.

And that was just the land.

The people were even better!

Maybe its because it was so damned far away from anything. Maybe it was because we were rugby players. Whatever it was, every person we had the opportunity to meet was so genuinely warm and friendly, it was down right humbling.

They fed us and big belly roll laughed with us. They shared their homes and culture with us. They played great footy and drank cold beer with our entire group.

To think we did it all in the name of rugby!

To watch my country beat the Russians. AWESOME!  To see the All Blacks get their Haka on, LIVE.  AWESOME!  To win against the bookies by a half point spread against Australia, in Sydney. AWESOME!  To earn Man of the Match with two tries and solid tackling against the local side just outside Auckland. AWESOME!  To laugh and trade jerseys and sing songs with the local host clubs.  AWESOME!

Rugby is the great equalizer!

I speak for the entire group, the trip was incredible and I will cherish it for the rest of my life.

Many thanks to Simon Jones and Julie Johnson of Azzurro Travel and The Rugby Travel Company.

Cheers again to the good boys of Helensville RFC and Petersham RFC, with extra special gratitude to Andy Cummings and Adam Dunn.

Lest not forget all of the new friends we found across the pond, til soon, take good care.

“In our country, true teams rarely exist . . . social barriers and personal ambitions have reduced athletes to dissolute cliques or individuals thrown together for mutual profit . . . Yet these rugby players. with their muddied, cracked bodies, are struggling to hold onto a sense of humanity that we in America have lost and are unlikely to regain. The game may only be to move a ball forward on a dirt field, but the task can be accomplished with an unshackled joy and its memories will be a permanent delight. The women and men who play on that rugby field are more alive than too many of us will ever be. The foolish emptiness we think we perceive in their existence is only our own.” – Victor Cahn

It used to drive my Dad mad. Simply crazy! He was always a morning man, waking up at ‘O:dark, thirty’ before the rest of creatures began to stir. Grand Dad had similar ideas. He would proclaim that getting a jump on a long drive was good to do before the sun came up, ‘That night time dark air makes the engine run cooler..’

I, on the other hand, have
always been a night owl. Even when I were tired, I still had chutzpa to stay up to the wee hours.

That has changed. Some what..

I get up early now. I love to take walks before I do anything. Well, not anything, but most things. I get out of bed, put in my contacts and brush my grill piece, take my vitamins and drink a protein shake..and then go for my walk.

I live a couple blocks off the beach in Venice, CA and if you’ve ever visited, you know that the boardwalk is a bit gritty a lot of the time. No, no, I’m not complaining! I love the salty characters that mingle and mix on and around the colorful strip. I fit in and it makes me not feel so damn weird for having a mohawk or an ear ring or funny shoes or doing yoga poses admist the piano man and the guy on stilts or the lady that’s telling fortunes. I suppose I was made to live here..

Returning from digression, whilst I love the bustle of the boardwalk, in the morning its empty. Its quiet and its soft. The hard edges have yet to wake up and the day is fresh.

Waking up early allows my mind to boot up. My heart gets primed for a good day and the bits of oil that smooth my joints is well received. By the end of my 15 walk I’m ready to tackle the world..and yet, although I made a solid table of breaky this morning to kick it off right, its only 7:36am

Onward and upward!

I have been a salesman my entire life.  You can read a bit more about the history in that regard here, or if you know me, you know that to be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

In any event, lately, I am honored to be working for BizeeBee.com in Business Development and Sales.  That means that among other things, I am required to speak to quite a few good folks on the phone sharing the benefits of how our software can make running a Yoga Studio much simpler while retaining more students.

If you have ever done phone sales before, you know that some times it can be difficult to find a groove and get on the phone and more importantly, stay on the phone for extended periods of time.  When I first started in sales via the phone I would try to monitor my “On The Air’ time in an effort to make the most of my day.  This can be a good method, but I’ve found something that helps me a bit more.

Monitor the time I am not on the phone.

It’s a pretty simple process.  I set up sprints for myself lasting 50 minutes to make calls and I set my phone to lock the screen after a minute.  Thus, after I hang up on a call, I have exactly 60 seconds to make another call before it locks.  In the event it locks, I owe myself 10 pushups.

They add up. Quick.

I tally the number of times this happens and at the end of the 50 minute sprint, I crunch out the number of push ups I’ve accumulated.  My shoulders are thanking me for the exercise, but that’s not the point.

The result is being ever aware of my down time, thus I end up spending more time on the phone spreading the good word.

Onward and upward!